I am typically behind on social media so I only hear about the latest news when someone puts it up on one of the WhatsApp groups I belong to.
This week someone posted that one of the daughters of Yemi Osinbajo, Nigeria’s vice president & pastor in the Redeemed Christian church of God. Actually, that was not the big story. The big story was when someone claimed that the guy she was engaged to is a Muslim.
And so, began the next round of conversations. On one side – Pastor Yemi Osinbajo has failed as a parent and lost the moral ground to counsel people not to marry outside the Christian faith. On the other side – the girl is an adult, she can choose to marry whoever she chooses and it is not the fault of the parent if she chooses to marry outside the faith.
Well, the whole matter was put to rest the next day when someone posted this information from a news organization – “Our source also confirmed that Oluseun Bakare is a Christian and a worker in the Redeemed Christian Church of God.”
So, what was the whole hullabaloo about?
A pastor, I respect, who has been married for over 25 years told an interesting aspect of his marriage.
He met his wife when he was just 17. One of the most significant memories of the early days of meeting his wife was that she gave him a nice bible. He was a non-practicing Catholic at the time and his wife was a backslidden pastor’s daughter.
He was born again reading that Bible in college and they were married at the age of 21. Today, they have three sons and two daughters, all of whom are following Jesus.
According to him, he and his wife have performed badly at every single compatibility test. The question after the tests is always “how are you both still together?”
Listening to this raises the age-old long question – how do you have a great marriage?
If you grew up in the 1990s, you are probably familiar with the WWF (now WWE) buffet of wrestling entertainment. Actually, at that time most of us didn’t know it was entertainment, we thought these guys were really fighting and feuding for real. Imagine what that did to my childhood memories when I found out.
One of the big stars of those years was Shawn Michaels. He came with the swagger, the feuds and a signature move – Sweet Chin Music. He grew profile well enough and became one of the faces of the WWE franchise. And then, he decided to retire.
Actually, he retired twice. The first time was due to injury which he recovered from and came back. The second retirement, which became the final one, has a more personal ring to it.
I came across an interesting statistic. Shirley Glass, in researching her book Not Just Friends found that 25 percent of wives and 44 percent of husbands have had extramarital intercourse. Many of their affairs began at work. She found that from 1982 to 1990, 38 percent of unfaithful wives in her clinical practice were involved with someone from work.
From 1991 to 2000, the number of women’s work affairs increased to 50 percent. Men also are having most of their affairs with people from their workplace. Among the 350 couples she has treated, approximately 62 percent of unfaithful men met their affair partners at work. Seeing the same people for legitimate reasons frequently helps friendship develop.
I am sure we all know the unfortunate story of Joseph. Not that Joseph, I mean the other Joseph, the one who had to live down with the embarrassment of his fiance pregnant with a baby that wasn’t his and live married with her happily ever after
We typically just run over his story because Mary’s story is more dramatic – she was touched by an angel. Can you imagine Joseph position? Everyone knew of their engagement and what date they were married. Just a few months into the marriage, Mary bulge is noticeable and I am sure some neighbors did maths sessions on the couple.